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The Truth: "Bad" and "Just OK" Hair Days are More Common Than We Think

9:58 AM


But if you go to Instagram and look up #naturalhair you'd probably think I'm lying. Thanks to the increased presence of gorgeous natural hair via Instagram, Pintrest, Facebook and YouTube, there are tons of transitioners and naturals walking around wondering if they've somehow missed the mark.

The answer? Absolutely not.

The thing about social media is that although it is an all-access pass to personal lives and details of your favorite bloggers and vloggers, it also carries a heavy filter. No, not the Instagram filter that makes your skin look clearer, hair look shinier, or conceals unflattering body parts. I'm talking about the filter that determines what pictures and videos you share, and which ones you delete. Just like you wouldn't upload an unflattering photo of yourself to Facebook and make it your profile picture, some bloggers and vloggers choose not to show their mediocre or even bad hair days.

Why? Simply put, having great hair is a part of their brand.

We swoon over their curls, coils and kinks, hoping and praying that some day we will be able to reach their volume, their length, their thickness, their everything. We watch their videos, follow their blogs, stalk their Instagrams, and everything else in an attempt to latch on to their secrets for what seems like amazingly flawless hair at every second of the day. I find myself asking random questions, like don't these people have to sleep at night? Don't they work out? Does their hair ever get smushy, or even the least bit tangled? Why does it seem like they never have breakage, or a style that falls flat? Is there a product they DON'T like?

I am in no way throwing shade toward popular bloggers. As a budding blogger myself, I am beginning to learn more about the business side of this natural hair thing - and to a certain extent, I understand. But what is discouraging to me, and to countless others, is when natural hair celebrities and bloggers advertise to their fans and followers as if they've never had a misstep. Granted, they have likely been at this whole natural thing for years now, and have a pretty solid handle on styling and what works for them. But does that mean shielding us from things that don't work, or don't quite pan out?

When I first began my transition, I looked up to Kala of The KG Lifestyle because I could relate to her. We both had heat damage, and she openly took to YouTube to candidly share her frustrations with her hair and her journey. I've never met her in person (or talked to her), but I would want her to know that I appreciated her honesty. It made me feel as if I wasn't crazy, and that I wasn't the only one who had horrible hair days or completely failed when it came to a style. As I come closer to natural, I also find myself appreciating vloggers like Melshary who are completely honest and unfiltered in their reviews, opinions, and advice.

Honesty is important, and so is transparency to a certain degree. No, I don't need to know what you and your hair looks like the second you wipe the drool from your mouth and hop out of bed. But what is helpful (to me at least) is being realistic. Show me your bad hair days, so I am reassured that I'm not the only one. Let me know what your OK days look like, when you go on one of those protective styling binges and wear buns and twists, so I don't feel like I'm the only one who walks around looking like Felicia from Friday sometimes. Share some of your woes; like breakage, dryness, and flaking, because I know nobody's hair is 100% perfect 100% of the time. If certain products don't work, be honest. I know product-bashing isn't business savvy, but find a constructive way to share with your subscribers and followers what you don't like. 

At the end of the day, I'm not asking for bloggers and vloggers to save me. I'm just asking that we all be honest and realistic about our journeys. I have more average days than great. I spend most of my days with my hair pulled up into a bun, because I'd rather sleep in a few extra minutes than take the time to style it into a fancy updo or wash n' go. Truth be told, most of my "awesome hair" pics are from the weekend, when I have the time to get a great satin strip braidout, or shingle a wash n' go. Heck, as I write this article, my hair is pulled back in the most unflattering and boring bun to date. And it will stay this way, until I decide that I have enough time and energy to wash my hair and do that henna treatment for my scalp psoriasis that is WAY overdue. See what just happened there? Honesty. I don't do everything to and for my hair that I need to, and when I should. Because I, like you, have a life. And I'm working on being more honest and candid about the non-awesome parts of my transitioner journey. Sure, the basic or even unflattering pictures won't get the most likes on Instagram, but at least I am being honest. And I'm sure somewhere, somebody struggling with their hair appreciates it.
A regular, small bun fits the bill for today. My hair needs to be washed, but I was just too tired to do anything about it last night. Bloggers have *blah* hair days too. #naturalhair #transitioner #blogger #blah #bun
That boring bun...live on Instagram!

In what ways would you like to see your favorite bloggers and vloggers be more honest about their natural hair practices?

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2 comments

  1. I definitely appreciate your honesty! There are plenty of days that I wake up and have twist-out fails and have to think of something quick to look presentable for work. It’s nice to know that there are bloggers and vloggers that are also human, lol. I recommended you this morning on my instagram to those who want to hear the real from someone whose honest.

    Keep doing what you doing!

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  2. I have tried so many hair products based on reviews and haven't found anything I really love or works well. This whole natural hair journey is hard work. Half the styles I see vlogger do seem too complicated and time consuming. I tend to wear the same style and since I have moved back to los angeles, OMG by the end of the day my hair is a hot mess from the environment.
    Anyway, I do appreciate the honesty in your article and hope that these many many natural hair bloggers/vloggers keep it real all the way.

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