You're Kidding, Right? Odd, Awkward & Down Right Nasty Hair Growth Tips

My latest BGLH feature!

I'm sure that at one time or another, you have googled "hair growth tips" or something similar, in search of different ways to bolster your hair growth progress. In those searches, I'm pretty sure you've come across some common, and viable advice -- including moisturizing and sealing, protective styling, scalp massages, vitamins, exercise, etc. And then, I'm sure you've seen the obscure. The asenine. The gross. Just in case you haven't, here are four of the strangest hair growth tips, tricks, and treatments that are circulating around the interwebs.

You're Kidding, Right? Bull Sperm Treatments
Coming to a Beauty Supply near you.
Did your stomach just churn at the thought of massaging bull sperm into your locks? Mine did. However, across the pond in London, Aberdeen Organic Bull Semen Treatments are all the rage. An intense shot of protein (pun intended), the treatment is designed to leave hair strong and thick (hehe...sorry). Although it seems gross, at a particular salon in London, business is booming. Customers are allured to the repairative and restorative qualities of the treatment, and find solace in its colorless and odorless appearance. For more information about bull sperm treatments, click here.
Is this treatment just a bunch of bull? Most likely. In order for protein treatments to be beneficial to your hair (i.e. have restorative and restructuring impact), they have to be hydrolyzed (broken down into smaller sections). Proteins like eggs, bull sperm, and oat flour are on a molecular level, too large to have any significant impact. Maybe in the future, a hydrolyzed bull sperm.... HydroBull, anyone? For more information on protein treatments, click here.

You're Kidding, Right? Monistat
Yes, Miconazole nitrate aka yeast infection cream. All over the interwebs, men and women alike are singing the praises of the taboo tube. Many bloggers and youtubers have claimed to achieve amazing growth with the product -- to the tune of two or more inches in a month. Users apply either a mildly diluted formulation, or the product straight from the tube to the scalp.
Could there be valid science behind the unbelievable claims made by its users? Possibly. At the end of the day, Monistat is an anti-fungal cream -- helpful for eliminating fungus (if they are even present) from your scalp that inhibit growth, and create an optimal environment for your hair to grow. But Tea Tree oil can serve that same function. Although there have been no extensive studies on the effects of Monistat on hair growth, some doctors speculate that Monistat may interfere with the follicular bonding of receptors that cause hair loss -- spurring an increase in hair growth. But be warned, there are some side effects: headaches, burning/irritation at the site of application (scalp), ringing in the ears, and most concerning, extreme shedding/hair loss once use of the product ceases. Is it worth all that? You be the judge.

You're Kidding, Right? Tobasco/Hot Sauce
Right out the gate, I'm going to suggest using extreme caution with this one... it could be game over if it gets in your eyes. But on to the strangeness. Many naturals prescribe to the belief that by rubbing hot sauce or cayenne on your scalp, you will stimulate circulation and therefore stimulate hair growth.
Is this treatment a hot tip, or just a hot mess? Scientifically speaking, the active ingredient in peppers (capsaisin) has been proven to stimulate hair growth in one study. Don't go grabbing a bottle of Red Rooster just yet, though. In the study referenced above, the capsaisin used was administered by injection in mice, and orally ingested by humans. The only evidence to suggest that hot sauce/peppers work topically is anecdotal, at best. So yes, there is some proof out there that capsaisin works...just not in the way we want to believe it does.

You're Kidding, Right? Onion Juice
This remedy might make you want to cry. Of all the strange treatments, this one is probably the smelliest (but certainly a far cry from grossest...thank you, bull semen). According to several blogs and websites, onion juice's high sulfur content and antibacterial properties lend itself to ridding your scalp of bacteria that can inhibit growth, as well as stimulate hair follicle health. The process of extraction can be cumbersome, if you don't have a blender or food processor handy. For those who prefer hands-on, you can grate the onion and use a sieve or some sort of straining mechanism to press out the juice into a carrier oil of your choice. Otherwise, you can blend the entire onion (sans skin) and slap the paste on your scalp.
The treatment stinks, but the truth behind it doesn't entirely. According to a study done in 2002, onion juice proved to be an effective treatment for alopecia areata, a rare condition in which the body's own immune system attacks hair follicles to remove them from the scalp. After four weeks of treating the scalp twice daily, about 74% of trial participants saw hair growth returning. After six weeks, growth was observed in nearly 87% of patients. If the treatment is effective against an immune condition, there could be some benefit for those suffering from other forms of alopecia and hair loss.

What are some of the most odd hair growth treatments you have tried?